JANET STREET-PORTER: Idiot Andrew has no options

Prince Andrew is a man who has run out.

He has two cruel options – to pull the family through the mud or to pay.

The time for denying, avoiding escapes and waffling is over. After Judge Kaplan rejected the Duke’s attempt in the civil case of Virginia Giuffre, who claimed she was forced to have sex with him when the minor was fired, Randy Andy must make a life-changing decision.

Will he adapt to his previous stereotype with a pig’s head and hope that this mess will disappear? To continue claiming that he “doesn’t remember” ever meeting Miss Giuffre, even though the world saw a photograph of his arm encircling her waist? To remain in a bizarre alibi without sweating as proof that he did not go to a nightclub that night, even if he did not present any medical evidence?

Only a really stupid arrogant individual would do such a thing.

Unfortunately, Prince Andrew fits this description.

Mrs. Giuffre was given permission to continue and sue for personal injury and emotional stress. She claims that the convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein forced her to have sex with her friends, including the duke, and demands considerable compensation for her suffering and injury. Now both parties will prepare arguments by the end of July, present their evidence and whom they will propose to summon as an expert. The date of the exam is set for September.

JANET STREET-PORTER: Prince Andrew is the man who ran out of the way.  He has two cruel options - to pull the family through the mud or to pay

JANET STREET-PORTER: Prince Andrew is the man who ran out of the way. He has two cruel options – to pull the family through the mud or to pay

To support her case, Miss Giuffre could call Prince Charles, the Duke’s ex-wife Sarah Ferguson, and women known to have had sex with the prince. Andrew may be able to avoid a personal trip to New York, but will have to interrogate her legal team about his close friendship with convicted sex offenders Ghislaine Maxwell and Jeffrey Epstein, who committed suicide in their prison cell in August 2019. Details of his sexual preference would be part of her case.

The prospect of the amazingly eccentric (I’ll be kind) Sarah Ferguson, who will testify in Andrew’s defense, could be even more amusing than the recent episodes of Succession. Fergie is a beautiful woman, but absolutely naive. Who can forget that after the divorce from Andrew, she gave the world those “sucking fingers” in the headlines? Since then, he has staggered from one financial crisis to another, dieting, appearing on reality television shows and writing children’s books. Andrew persuaded Jeffrey Epstein to help him £ 15,000 to pay the former assistant to her additional debts if it could restructure £ 5 million. Sarah has since apologized for taking the money and said “my judgment has been obscured.”

Fergie, immune to criticism, defends her ex-husband from anyone who listens. The couple are close friends, although they are divorced, and share a royal lodge in Windsor rented from the Crown Estate. When the queen refused to pay Andrew’s legal bills, he was forced to flog the only home he owned – a £ 18 million Swiss cottage. Realize that he had to pay the former owner the £ 6 million he owed until she threatened legal action.

Airmiles Andy and Goofy Fergie are characters of beloved comedians and playwrights, and they both seem blissfully unaware of how they appear to the outside (non-royal) world.

JANET STREET-PORTER: After Judge Kaplan rejected the Duke's attempt in Virginia Giuffre's civil proceedings to force him to have sex when he was expelled, Randy Andy must make a life-changing decision.

JANET STREET-PORTER: After Judge Kaplan rejected the Duke’s attempt at civilian proceedings by Virginia Giuffre, who claimed she was forced to have sex with him when he was expelled, Randy Andy must make a life-changing decision.

After meeting them several times and sitting next to Andrew at dinner, I can confirm their complete lack of social skills.

Sarah is charming and sweet, but Andrew is alarmingly stupid.

Virginia Giuffre’s suit is a real-life soap opera, but at its core are extremely serious allegations of sexual abuse and coercion, the story of a young girl who says she was adapted to please older wealthy men while legally a child.

Whatever really happened between Virginia Giuffre and Prince Andrew will be decided in court, but the damage to his position is devastating. Reputation damage experts say Giuffre’s gamble has failed and his shares are now at the bottom.

If Andrew decided to question the case, he could harm the monarchy, and it would certainly clarify aspects of his personal life and friendship that no member of the royal family would be willing to divulge. What was left of his privacy would disappear.

It is well documented that Prince Andrew is not the smartest tool in the box, that his brain cells barely exceed the number of medals and honors he has received for his life, which is remarkable for his lack of meaningful achievements. After leaving the Royal Navy in 2001, Andrew managed to climb the rank of Honorary Vice Admiral, although he spent most of his time on the golf course or on a plane somewhere in the hot and distant United Kingdom.

JANET STREET-PORTER: It could only get worse for the Duke.  Now he has to decide whether to cough and bow down.  Forever

JANET STREET-PORTER: It could only get worse for the Duke. Now he has to decide whether to cough and bow down. Forever

Any idea of ​​overcoming the storm disappeared after his disastrous BBC conversation with Emily Maitliss in 2019, when he steadfastly claimed that in the night in a photo with Miss Giuffre (when he says they visited a nightclub and had sex, even though he knew she was 17) was at home with his family after visiting Pizza Express in Woking.

Giuffre’s legal team says he can present a witness who says he saw the prince in Tramp that night.

It could only get worse for the duke.

Now he has to decide whether to cough and bow down. Forever.

Given that the Palace has just announced a number of national events, years of planning the celebrations of his mother’s 70-year rule, which makes history, my money would be for option two.

February 6 will be Queen 96. She is officially birthday in June, but every member of her immediate family will want to wish her all the best and support her after the lonely months after her husband’s death in April last year.

The Platinum Jubilee celebrations are designed to whip up a nation on the feast of love and to rekindle our love of pomp and history. During the weekend on public holidays in June, there will be a birthday parade with 1400 soldiers, followed by an RAF flight. The lighthouses will be lit up and down the ground. There will be the usual Thanksgiving service, followed by a day at Derby and a live rock concert from the Mall. Street parties are scheduled for Sunday and a competition for the best Platinum Pudding is held to sum up all the great things about Britain and Her Majesty.

Where does someone who chose two convicted child sex offenders as their close friends fit in this fairy-tale extravagance – and who took them home to their mother and showed them off at races and social events?

Would you like to see Prince Andrew at your pudding competition or hand out cakes at a local street party?

I thought not.

The best thing Andrew can do now is negotiate a settlement without admitting responsibility, quietly resigning himself to all his ceremonial roles, packing his golf clubs and finding a resort in a pretty remote piece of the British Commonwealth – or in one of his favorite Russian satellite states – where he can manage reservations on the putting green and ride his new 300,000 Bentley up and down Main Street.

Time to bow, sir.

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